In Alex Words

I really need to get in the habit of writing on here a little more often. I find myself saying," I need to write this stuff down" all the time. Well, duh isn't that what you started a blog for? I am a little slow sometimes.

Alex is absolutely the funniest kid I have ever met. The shit he comes up with is at times is hilarious. In no particular order, some of the things he has recently mused about:

As my mother and I were talking in the kitchen, Alex was in the powder room. I have no idea what we were talking about, but apparently it was very distracting to Alex and his task. He yells out, " can you be quiet, I am trying to poop."

In reference to another toilet function, he begins to laugh and shouts out, " hey! Look, my lemonade made my pee!" Yellow in the cup. Yellow in the toilet. Yep, hysterical stuff for a 3 year old boy.

Alex asked me, " Did God make me?" Yes. " With a machine?" No, with love. " Where?" In my tummy. " That's disgusting!" He was very, very serious with this conversation and didn't skip a beat either.

He still has the very cute habit of making his object words cutesy little boy words. When something isn't in his direct line of vision he begins to call for it, like it is a dog and will come running to him. "Trainey? Traaainey? Trainey!?"
Cuppie is also a frequently lost pet.

Comfany, is a word that I absolutely loved. It was an awesome word. He requests every night after getting into his bed and settling down, for me to make him comfany. Which simply means, comfy. I'd place his blanket of choice on his and his grin was total self satisfaction. Now, today, he told the cat he was going to make her comftable. Still cute, but not comfany. My little man is getting big.

There is so much more, but since I have not been writing it down, I am already forgetting.

Little Things

So many thoughts and needs and wants have poured through my brain over the past week. The stress and fear have left me ragged, depleted. I feel like I can't process any more. There are many details to try and see to before the insurance coverage runs out. The little man has gone to the dentist. In true Alex form, he was a riot. " Hey dentist lady, you gonna look at me teeth, aaahhh?!" No cavities, hooray. But, his beloved " ni-night" that he stuffs into his mouth and is so comforted by is causing his teeth to disfigure. As soon as the dentist, a nice lady younger than I asked if Alex was still using a pacifier and I answered, "it's not a pacifier" Alex joined in with - " it's my finga's - see" and popped two in his mouth and started sucking. He has never, no once sucked on his fingers, nor a pacifier. Always his blanket. I don't know how he knew that we were headed into that awful territory of you can't have your blankie anymore, but my man lied boldly through hi damn fingers without batting an eye. Sigh, he loves his stinky ass " ni-night."

Pediatrician's appointments for well visits have been made. Cait and Alex went yesterday. Vision, hearing, an vaccination updates were on the menu. They did fabulouslly until they realized that " shotses" were intended. The doctor hadn't even come in for the exam and they were both crying and screaming, " no shots, I don't want shots Mommy." Breaks my heart, but I do believe vaccinations are necessary. Catie bearly cooperated for her wellness exam. Alex performed for his. " I am a turtle, I am a monkey, I can stand on my head with one foot in the air, no shotses ok?" Poor kids. 5 for Catie because the 4 year old well visit is just brutal, she shrieked and cried and good God it was awful. Alex cried for her " why you do that, no hurting Catie." And then it was his turn. For 1 flu shot. He was all revved up by previewing his sister. But it got done. The afternoon at home was nothing short of sweet and pathetic. Caitlin proclaimed, " I feel like I am going to die." Then qualified that statement with " like not die for real, just like I am going to die of shots." She also required pictures of her band aids and boo boo's. She also declared she was unable to clean up her markers and paper because " my arms hurt too much to move" and gave a display of letting them hang limply by her side as she meweled pittifully. The drama. Alex was full of hugs and " I love you Mommy and Daddy." It is these moments that bolster my spirit and give me courage. He was being a nose honker as well, and really thinks that he is hysterical. Anthony get's his turn at the doctor next week, hopefully the little one can keep the secret...

Before bed, I asked Alex for "big hugs". In Alex world big hugs are an entire little body that wraps himself as tightly as he can around the other person. It is a fabulous hug. He solemnly held up his fingers and said " only two big hugs Mommy then I go night-night."

These little moments and these little laughs and smiles are what I am learning to appreciate more and more each day. Every single person has worries. I have huge worries but all of these little things now seem so much more important the big worries. Hopefully as we work our way through this mess of unemployment and insurance loss and money worries the little things will shine through more and more. I love my 3 little things more than I can describe.

Alex is comfortably cocooned in bed with the offending "ni-night" firmly grasped in his teeth

3 of Catie's 5 boo-boo's

" take my pitya Mommy!"

A little critter comfort after a long day

3

In my thirtieth year, I gave birth to my third child. Lots of 3's right there. And in my thirty third year, he turned -------- 3!.

My third child, my baby boy was the biggest, best, scariest surprise I ever received. Biggest, because the only bigger surprise I can think of is well, I can't. Best, because I wouldn't trade him for anything. Scariest, well, I wasn't planning on a third. His sister was only six months old. We were BROKE. Broke. I already had postpartum depression, how the hell could this be happening again??? Well, I know how it happened, but really God, do you really think this is a good idea? Me, as a mother of 2 is kind of pathetic, you are going to add a THIRD to this mix, and what? You'll hope for the best for the child, for the mother? I was so scared. I was so angry. And then scared again. I already doubted my ability to mother the children I had. I felt overwhelmed and anxious and I worried all the time. I didn't have fun with this thing called motherhood, and here we go again. That was three years ago.

I still have PPD. I still have fear. We are still broke. I still don't know how to have fun with this thing called motherhood on many days. But oh how they make me melt. Especially this third child, my baby boy who is not a baby anymore. He is 3 now. He will start preschool, and I will cry when I let him. Because he is my "last" baby. Happy Birthday Alex! You are such a funny boy. You are strong willed and you really know that people see you. You know you leave a mark! You add hilarity to everything you do even when I am restraining my self from locking you in a closet! The way you tell me " shhh mommy, you need to use nice words to me!" makes me want to laugh my ass off and swat your behind at the same time. You still LOVE your " NIE-NITE!" I do too kiddo. Love you my little man.

The last night as a 2 year old!

I'm not listening to you people sing Happy Birthday to me!

Tuckered out after a long birthday, Mommy's heart melted!

Arts and Crafts

They suck. Period.

I hate letting them have glitter, glue, glitter glue, scissors and anything that will make a mess that I will have to be cleaned off of them, the floor, the table, etc. I let them do crafts once or twice a year - not kidding. Today was one of those days. They were so happy. They were not fighting. They were gluing, glittering, glitter gluing and foam shaping to their hearts content and it was then I realized, it is so quiet in here, they are playing together! They are having fun! They really aren't being too messy! And oh, the google eyes are really cute :o)

So I stole away to the basement to do some secret clandestine LAUNDRY. It was almost enjoyable. Then I came back up the stairs and noticed a horrible amount of what I wrongly assumed was shedded dog hair. Shed?!?! Oh, so silly of you to think that Mommy... Plastic. Round. Safety. Scissors. THEY CUT THEIR HAIR, THE DOGS HAIR AND THE CAT'S HAIR. Holy what the F people. No more crafts. No pictures either, I was busy throwing craft supplies away. HRUMPH.

Rain and Soccer

Yesterday I took the kiddo's to get their new soccer equipment, This will be Anthony's third year playing soccer and he really loves it. He is fast, nimble and seems to have endless energy. His cleats and shin guards from last year were too small for him, and too big for Caitlin, how's that for luck. So, off we go. Alex is in tow and at the store is remanded to the custody of his stroller. He has a train in hand as is fine at first but then begins to ask to play soccer too. Try explaining to the almost 3 year old that he only has one more year to wait. C and AJ were getting really excited looking at cleats, I want those, I want those ( orange, purple, yellow ) they had it all. I wanted cheap. As in will be worn for about 3 months and never again cheap. The shoe guy pointed to a sign that said 14.99 - that was my sign! It took entirely too long getting both kids into cleats that fit their feet properly with guards and socks on, so I finally tell them to do a jog back and forth and something is not quite right... I bring them both back over and am checking fit, checking socks, Alex is STILL whining I wanna pway soccer... Finally I said to the shoe guy, I'm not sure if it's me but I think I have their sizes wrong for the cleats, somethings looking wrong. He said, oh that's because they are baseball cleats. JACK - I asked for cheap soccer cleats... Round 2 of picking out and trying on and picking out new shin guards and Caitlin HAS to have pink soccer socks to match her pick " check shoes" (nike brand). 2 pairs of the cheapest soccer cleats I could get on their feet. Clearance rack " pee wee" size shin guards for the Bug and not clearance rack but still cheapish shin guards for Anth, we pay I cringe because holy hell over $80 and we didn't even get a damn soccer ball...
Then the monsoon hits. Seriously, thunder, lightning, sheets of rain. I figure we will wait it out in the store, my Dad calls there is a tornado watch what am I doing? Trying to get 3 kids to the car in the deluge that just opened on us. ( Should have brought the ark, haha.) He said stay where we are, kids are begging to please go home Mommy, Mommy doesn't want to get wet guys, lets just wait a few more minutes. My Dad seconds that plan but all 3 kids veto with tears and fear and so I say ok, let's make a run for it. Cate and Anth grab a stroller handle and we will RUN. We got soaked to the skin. Alex cried because he is wet. Catie laughed and laughed. Anthony was pissed, just pissed. We get all buckled in and head home, and they were cracking up everytime we hit water and it made that big spray off the side of the car. Now that was funny.
Later on when the sun comes out, we head off to soccer clinic where Caitlin gets her first chance ever to play soccer and is wearing her new cleats and the storm clouds from hell roll over and we repeated getting soaked to the skin and running to the car. This time Anthony cried because he didn't get to play soccer yet, Caitlin beamed because the 2 drills she did were the icing on her cake. Poor Alex was just pissed!

That teenie tiny little dot in the middle there, with her foot on the ball, yep that one! That's my girl. ( Note the ominous clouds gathering to the left)

She is so happy! Literally 3 seconds later it started to pour.